Wildebeest Care is the Key to Economic Recovery!

Centered by the ever-present bronze-tinted, but opaque teleprompters (whispers among the White House Residential Staff say that before joining Michelle in bed each night, the TPs–as they call them–are arranged on either side of the Presidential bed’s headboard with a script running to the effect, “Yeah, baby! Yeah, Momma; Daddy’s got yo’ back and I cannot lie!” and “The Big O’s a gonna fix it right!”–there has been no video to confirm this, unfortunately, but keep watching to YouTube, you never know) and flanked by his Minister of Propaganda; the Secretary of the Interior, amazingly the only nominee that had paid his taxes, but expects to recoup that money through the Indian Affairs and Casinos Department; and Wildebeest Czar, Jim Folwer, the anaconda-wrestling, geriatric right-hand man, sidekick, schlub and patsy to Marlin Perkins on Wild Kingdom, President (Transparency and No Earmarks) Obama addressed the ever-so-important National Wildlife Reform Forum yesterday.

After introductions and the wait for the teleprompters to warm up, he prefaced (reading from said devices) the need for the forum with, “By a wide margin, the biggest threat to our nation’s balance sheet is the skyrocketing cost of Wildebeest care–it’s not even close.  If we want to create jobs and rebuild our economy, and get our federal budget under control, then we have to address the crushing cost of Wildebeest care this year, in this administration.” And finally, he expressed the direness of emergency, “The cost of Wildebeest care now causes a  bankruptcy in America every thirty seconds.” Gosh, who gnu?

When confronted by a reporter, that Wildebeests are not native to the United States or the Western hemisphere for that matter, and pretty much restricted to the African continent and almost exclusively to the Serengeti, and asked for the research regarding the statistics on bankruptcies caused by Gnu Care, the effervescent and bouncy, Christina Romer of the Council of Economic Czars and Rasputins (doesn’t she remind you of your old Bozo Bop Bag, the punching ballon from your childhood, or a Russian Nested Doll that you want to un-nest to see if she just disappears), she bounced and giggled, “I’m gonna [sic] to have to  check the numbers for you; I think the important thing is the idea is absolutely true.”

So, now we have another (one) expressly derived reason and cause of the Economic Crisis and the KEY to recovery–fix Wildebeest Care!

In reality, he was centered between the ever-present teleprompters, and we’re still awaiting the video evidence regarding the WH Bedroom rumors, and flanked by his minions, but Dear Leader was speaking before the Health Care Forum and indeed The Key to recovery was fixing health care.

“By a wide margin, the biggest threat to our nations balance sheet is the skyrocketing cost of health care; it’s not even close.” Followed by, “If we want to create jobs and rebuild our economy, and get our federal budget under control, then we have to address the crushing cost of health care this year in this administration.” and “The cost of health care now causes a  bankruptcy in America Every thirty seconds.”

The only close statistic that could be found (somewhere out in the electronic ether) to support his last statement was from a  2005  column (again, somewhere) by Elizabeth Warren (we don’t know who or of what importance she is) who wrote, that…” someone files bankruptcy in the aftermath serious health problem every thirty seconds.” which provided no specific evidence regarding the made-up statistic. And when FOXNews confronted Christina Romer, of the Council of Economic Advisers, (I still think she looks like a Bozo Bop Bag, sorry, members of NOW) regarding the 30 second bankruptcy rate statistic, she actually did replied, “I’m gonna [sic] to have to  check the numbers for you; I think the important thing is the idea is absolutely true.”

So, again, The ONE, The Messiah, His Royal Obamaness has claimed that another specific cause to our economic downfall requires immediate and emergency consideration and fixing with TRILLIONS of non-existent Dollars from top 2% taxing of the U.S. citizens, along with the Housing Crisis, the Banking Crisis, the Auto Manufacturing Crisis with the Spendulus and OmniBS Bills. Man, did Rahm (I’m a Israeli ballerina, not a Muslim terrorist dancer) Emanuel was correct, you can never let a crisis (or four) go to waste!

But, let me put forth Dr. Charles Krauthammer’s look at HRO’s plans:

Obama’s ‘Big Bang’ Agenda by Charles Krauthammer

Amazing. As an explanation of our current economic difficulties, this is total fantasy.

The logic of Obama’s address to Congress went like this:

“Our economy did not fall into decline overnight,” he averred. Indeed, it all began before the housing crisis. What did we do wrong? We are paying for past sins in three principal areas: energy, health care, and education — importing too much oil and not finding new sources of energy (as in the Arctic National Wildlife Refuge and the Outer Continental Shelf?), not reforming health care, and tolerating too many bad schools.

The “day of reckoning” has now arrived. And because “it is only by understanding how we arrived at this moment that we’ll be able to lift ourselves out of this predicament,” Obama has come to redeem us with his far-seeing program of universal, heavily nationalized health care; a cap-and-trade tax on energy; and a major federalization of education with universal access to college as the goal.

And another from Charles today:  Deception at Core of Obama Plans By Charles Krauthammer

Forget the pork. Forget the waste. Forget the 8,570 earmarks in a bill supported by a president who poses as the scourge of earmarks. Forget the “$2 trillion dollars in savings” that “we have already identified,” $1.6 trillion of which President Obama’s budget director later admits is the “savings” of not continuing the surge in Iraq until 2019 — 11 years after George Bush ended it, and eight years after even Bush would have had us out of Iraq completely.

Forget all of this. This is run-of-the-mill budget trickery. True, Obama’s tricks come festooned with strings of zeros tacked onto the end. But that’s a matter of scale, not principle.

All presidents do that. But few undertake the kind of brazen deception at the heart of Obama’s radically transformative economic plan, a rhetorical sleight of hand so smoothly offered that few noticed.

The logic of Obama’s address to Congress went like this:

go the Title Link to read the rest

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